Artist Statement: "Gas Lit"
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse that instills an extreme sense of anxiety and confusion that causes a person to question and distrust their own feelings, desires, and memories. Through a series of lies and manipulations, an abuser can create an alternate reality in which their victim is at fault for their own mistreatment and subsequent “over” reactions. The victim’s mental stability, emotional stability, self-confidence, and self-esteem are degraded to the point that they can no longer function independently. They become depressed and isolated forcing them to rely on their abuser for their identity, reality, and purpose. Within a co-dependent relationship, an abuser dismantles once admired traits to achieve a sense of superiority and create self-satisfying opportunities at the “gas lit” individual’s expense. The victim is left as a crippled, hollow shadow of the person they once were. Escape is a challenging feat inside a co-dependent and toxic relationship. How does a person identify their source of pain as the person they deeply love, trust, and rely on? What means will it take to eradicate the bond between abuser and victim? When they do escape, how does a person begin to cope with the trauma from years of psychological abuse? How do they begin to understand what has happened and learn to forgive themselves for not escaping sooner? This body of work is my personal experience answering these questions. It is the reconstruction of memories and emotions meant to explore the conflict between the need to escape unrelenting pain and the unforgiving dependency on its source. I’ve created a dream like reality that allows for the exploration of interwoven painful experiences and cherished memories. My work is heavily influenced by my own life, but more specifically by conflicting themes repetitive throughout my experiences: safety in danger, love in neglect, knowledge in deceit, fear in hope, and hope in endings.
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Who is Lexie?Just a fourth semester painting BFA trying her best. Archives
November 2017
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